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              The Secret is Charm

 

 

All the things that have been said so far are about how you can create a favorable impression. There is something that is equally or even more important than that, and that is to make the other person feel comfortable. Help the other person relax.

Any way you have been chatting for quite some time so you do know a great deal about each other. The best thing you can do is to ease the tension and break the ice. Sometimes the ice gets so thick that you can literally feel it. Break it up by cracking a joke or two. But the joke should be spontaneous and in keeping with the situation or else it will fall flat. Do not rehearse a joke because a rehearsed joke Expect more - Great Expectations sounds…well…rehearsed.     The key word here is charm. Use all the charm that you can muster. Try to be as considerate and as thoughtful as possible. Do not dominate the conversation but try to get the other person talking. People generally love to talk about themselves so try to get the other person talking by asking about the person’s work. Show interest in whatever the other person says. Try to be a good conversationalist. A good conversationalist is not a person who talks well, but is one who listens well as well. So try to be a good listener. And while you are listening try not to get distracted by something else or the other person might feel that you are losing interest in what he or she is saying.  Then comes the question, “what do you do if you find that the other person is dominating the conversation?” Well, in that case listen patiently for a minute or two and then give a subtle sign like a raised eyebrow or a smile through the corner of your mouth. If the other person is intelligent enough, he or she will get the cue. If not, then take your chance, you might have to listen to this person for the rest of your life.   

Humor rarely fails. But again take care not to over do it. There is only one thing worse than a total lack of humor and that is too much humor.

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